It’s a pretty well known fact that if you get a car with me, you have a 50/50 chance of being in a car accident. I’ve backed my mom’s car into a friends car when we were both pulling out at the same time. When she told me to go forward, I said “Ok,” and forgot to put it in drive before hitting the gas again. Nothing was damaged and Mom never knew. Then there is the case of my four flat tires, all only one at a time. One had a nail, one asploded due to the temperature change, while driving in the snow, up to Philly, at eleven o’clock at night. The next two were because I started dozing in the middle of the after noon and hit curbs. Then I almost totaled my car when I ran into someone at nine in the morning because, once again, I was falling asleep. And again in the afternoon, but this time I just bent the hood a little bit. Don’t worry, I got some multi-vitamins and haven’t had any problems since… with sleeping at the wheel. My most recent was while driving Mom’s car, in the rain on our (my sis and I), way to Michigan, in the rain, and it wasn’t my fault. The car in front of us got cut off and we couldn’t stop in time because of the slick roads. The license plate on Mom’s car got folded like a hotdog, but no scratches other than that.

Then there’s my favorite story to tell. It usually goes something like this…


“So then there was the time that I crashed my 2001, four-wheel-drive, manual transmission, four cylinder, one horse-power, 2.5 gallon tank, custom paint job, all American, hybrid, Mustang.”

“What?”

“Well, we were heading out to do some four-wheeling on a trail, and I put her in drive. Something got real sticky and she backed into a Dodge pick-up that was parked behind us. I finally got out and pulled her forward onto the trail myself. When I got back in, she went forward without a problem.”

They’re usually still dumbfounded at this point, “You crashed a Mustang? When did you get a Ford Mustang?”

“I never said it was a Ford. I said mustang, as in my horse. I crashed my horse into a Dodge pick-up, and her big butt put a three inch dent that cost me a thousand bucks to fix.”

“YOU CRASHED YOUR HORSE?!”